We’ve all been there. While mindlessly scrolling on social media, you see pictures of friends doing something fun without you. It could be a spring break trip, a shopping spree, or just a night out, but you can’t help but look at the perfectly posed photo with the perfect caption without thinking, “Wow, my life is boring.”
The same goes for meetings, events, and social gatherings. The social pressure brought on by all these things builds and the fear of missing out hits you hard. You decide to say yes to every opportunity thrown at you because you feel obligated. The feeling of being burnt out becomes all too real and you forget what it’s actually like to fill your life with things that you love.
Why do you say yes to allllll of the commitments? Do you really want to feel pulled in 18 different directions, or are you saying yes out of guilt? What are you afraid of missing out on?
You know what you could be doing with your time if you gave up things you felt obligated to do? Whatever your dang heart desires. What kinds of things do you wish you had the time for in your life? For me, I wanted to relax and read more books. I found that I loved to cook and prep meals, and wanted to make time for that. I’ve also wanted to learn more about new hobbies such as gardening and watercolor painting. Whatever it is you wish to fill your life with, now is the time to stop waiting for the perfect time. And I’m not trying one bit to preach to you about self love/self care. Finding the joy in missing out is about taking control of your choices and living the life you envision for yourself.
I saw a quote on Pinterest last fall that’s been driving my decision making process:
Work while they sleep.
Learn while they party.
Save while they spend.
Live like they dream.
This quote has also given me peace in knowing that I don’t have to be a typical college student. I thought I was missing out on what everyone said was “the best years of my life.” During my freshman year, many of the other girls on my dorm floor would be going out to party multiple nights during the week. Even though I had no interest in joining them, I couldn’t help but feel like I was missing out on something. My #1 priority was working on my photography business and school work. This is where I learned to find the joy in missing out though. I would hear some of the other girls complain about not having enough money or their poor GPA’s. Maybe I was missing out on some fun, but when I look at the big picture, missing out was bringing my closer to my goals. Whatever stage of life you’re in, you’re going to feel pressured to fit the norm. I challenge you to really break down and analyze WHY you feel like you’re missing out. Getting down to the nitty-gritty can help you realize that it’s usually because of other people’s opinions. Going your own route is difficult, but please keep your long term goals in mind. How can skipping just one event or obligation open up an opportunity to fill your life with something you dream about?
When I finally got to the point where I could embrace the joy in missing out, my life was so much fuller. Not only did I find better ways to spend my free time, but I was able to cultivate more life-giving friendships with like-minded people. It’s important to cut out friends if they constantly make you feel left out and just say no to volunteering at that event that you dread attending. Think about how things are going to make you feel before agreeing. Disconnect from technology and give yourself the space to explore what brings you joy and start filling your life with those things.
How will you find the joy in missing out? Will you:
- Get the exercise you've been feeling guilty about since January 1st.
- Call your grandma. Better yet - invite yourself over to bake or sew or do whatever she does for fun. (Moms work great for this too)
- Create a meal plan and/or prep a few freezer meals while listening to your favorite podcast.
- Organize your pantry….or your closet….or how about your whole house???
- Invite two of your closest friends to lunch and try a new restaurant.
- Volunteer for a cause that brings you joy.
- Create a spreadsheet that’ll break down how your money is being spent down to the last dollar.
- Brainstorm ways you can make some extra cash doing tasks you enjoy. And actually do them!
Let me know in the comments below how you are finding JOMO- the joy of missing out . Whether it’s allowing you to spend more time with your family or get a few extra hours of sleep, I want hear about it!
